Carole Anne Scott

Speaking on the phone with her dear friend in Louisiana, Sacred Heart parishioner and West Roxbury resident, Petula Nanton, couldn’t quite believe the news she was hearing. The woman, a devout Roman Catholic, who at one time had even considered entering the convent, was telling Petula that she had left the Church because “it just didn’t have anything for me.”

Deeply concerned about this, Petula began to think about what her friend had said and what message God might have in that news for her own life. Out of her reflections came a firm conviction that she should “wake up and do something.”

Petula states, “I thought about how my husband and I come to Mass at Sacred Heart, but don’t really talk to anyone and don’t really know anyone, so I called Father who said a million other couples in the Parish feel that same way. That’s where the idea of a Couples Club came from.”

Msgr. Kelley put Petula and her husband Elton in touch with another young couple Lindsay and Robert Palazzolo whom he thought might also be interested in forming a group. Through the miracles of e-mail, they made the initial contact with each other and agreed to form a Couples Club in the Parish.

Notices of the new organization were placed in the Parish Bulletin, and Lindsay and Robert spoke at the 11:00 a.m. Mass to encourage couples to consider joining. Although she was once a lector, Petula admits to feeling uncomfortable in front of large groups, a trait shared by Elton. As a result, they shied away from the public-speaking role, however, Elton played a very active role by writing out the text for fledgling group’s announcements, and both couples were available to chat after Mass with those interested in the Club.

The need for such a group is apparent in a parish as large as Sacred Heart where it can be difficult to get to know other parishioners. In a recent interview, Robert echoed Petula’s sentiments, saying “One of the things I’m looking forward to is really getting to know the people in the pews.” For Lindsay and Robert, that is made even a bit more difficult since as Choir members, they are not seated with the congregation. By the time they have descended from the choir loft, most of the parishioners have left the Church!

Unlike the Nantons, the Palazzolos are also at a greater disadvantage because they do not come from this area, but moved here from Michigan in response to a job offer. For Lindsay too, the proposed Club is envisioned as a way to build community. “I look forward to forming relationships with people in the parish who might otherwise have been difficult to meet,” she stated, adding “Parishes used be to the center of community life. At church, people met, became friends, went to cookouts, and to social events. Now people only have so much time as they are working hard.”

The founding couples have deliberately left the shape of the new organization and its goals flexible, so that those who join will have input into what the Club might become. Unfortunately, we were heading to press before their first meeting, which took place on June 12; Petula told me, however, that she was “anxious to hear what the other couples have to say.”

In their announcement made from the pulpit, both Lindsay and Robert again stressed that it will be up to the members to decide what form the Club takes. As Robert said, “We are very flexible. This is early in the formation process and we haven’t defined what we’ll be doing yet. We’re four people launching a brave new venture, but we have great hopes of helping people build their spiritual lives and come to know each other better and God better.”

Petula also has a strong vision of what she personally hopes the Couples Club will become, saying, “I’d like it to be a real community, one that reaches out to others and is more like a family. If someone needs help, we’d ask if we could bring them a meal. The group would pray together and build on that solid spiritual foundation to socialize together.”

Although the Palazzolos are true newlyweds having been married for only one year and the Nantons are relative ones, having been married for six years now, they all agree that the Club should be open to couples of all ages. They also agree that having different ages would serve to strengthen the group.

Another view that they hold in common is that marriage isn’t always easy. As Petula explained, “Being married, you need support from other couples. There should be someone you can go to and say, ‘This happened. What do I do?’”

Lindsay shares the same sentiments. In a totally separate interview, she told me, “We are hoping to have a mix of ages, so that people can share their various experience. They say that some are difficult to get through like the birth of a first child or when the kids go off to school. If people know that there are patterns of tough times, they will learn from the stories of others that too they can get through things.”

Despite this emphasis on sharing and caring concern, both couples were quick to advise that the group in not intended as a therapy or counseling session, a point that Msgr. Kelley also stressed.

If you are interested in joining the Couples Club, feel free to contact them at the Rectory. This promises to be a new and exciting venture, one that should prove to be a spiritually and socially rewarding personal and community-building experience!